Tag: life

Forever

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Photo by Isaac Wendland on Unsplash

The other day, I caught a glimpse of forever. It’s really not that far, you know—forever. It comes up much quicker than we think. And all of a sudden, we are standing on the edge, looking out over all that has been, all that will be, and all that is.

All that has been. This is your past—a past you cannot change. The mistakes you’ve made, the lessons you’ve learned, the successes you’ve experienced, and the milestones you’ve reached. This past has laid the foundation of your life and has contributed to the programming that has made you who you are. It has created in you the beliefs and the ideas with which you now face the world. Bear in mind that many of those beliefs started in you when you were very young. When you didn’t know any different. They were instilled by well-meaning adults who had their own views of the world tainted by their own outdated beliefs, skewed world views, and faulty programming.

But as you look out across forever, it is tempting to focus on all that will be. The possibilities… they are compelling and exciting. You could create a whole new career, find a new partner, get a new job, buy a new home, come into some money. But there is also the other side of all that will be—the possibility that your plans might not pan out the way you’d like. Or some misfortune may befall you, or you will get stuck in a rut from which you cannot escape. There are always negative forces that counter the good and lend perspective. And life is always about how we respond and how we summon the strength within us to push forward, to measure our steps, and to created positivity and joy. If you don’t have a capacity for creating positive, all that will be—the future—may be a hard pill to swallow.

Which leads us to all that is. This, my friends, is where life happens. This is where we must stop and focus our energies. Because all that is is where we can work on redefining our limiting beliefs. This is where we can reprogram our self-talk. This is where we can set ourselves up for all that will be. All that is… where we develop our talents, our strengths, and our commitment to ourselves. This is where we adjust so we ca become the best version of ourselves.

So as you catch your glimpse of forever, remember that all of your focus and energy should be on all that is. Working solely in this sector of forever—the present—will help you to overcome all that has been and prepare yourself for all that will be.

Take a Step…

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Today, I want to play a game of What if…. This is a game that we don’t often play, especially in our increasingly social-media-obsessed world. We spend our time viewing the lives and “successes” of others rather than thinking about our own. As long as our day-to-day life is going smoothly, we prefer not to consider what might be if only we took the first step, chipped away at our goals a little at a time, or simply started.

I say “game” because thinking about What if… can be fun. It’s easy and risk-free. You get to try on possibilities from the comfort of your own living room. What was it that you once dreamed you might do? Have you ever really thought about it? Is there any way to move yourself closer? Do you even want to?

So we’re going to start with this one: What if… you were living the life you’ve always dreamed of? What would that look like?

Of course, there is the chance you already are living the life of your dreams. But I know that somewhere along the way, many people give up and settle for something less than their dreams—something closer to their current reality. Whatever obstacles they come up against keep them from moving forward. What if… you hadn’t given up? Where might you be now?

What if… you took a moment to examine what’s been holding you back? Knowing what’s standing in your way can only help you remove barriers or adjust your approach to move beyond them. For me, it’s my tendency toward introversion. I need quiet and solitude to process information my brain is taking in, the path my life is going, and even things that happen on a given day. My processing looks different from what’s considered the “norm” in our busy, extroverted society. But knowing that I need this alone-time is my superpower. When I am overwhelmed, I can step aside, recharge, and move forward with greater power and a greater sense of direction. I don’t need to be around people who fight against my introversion, and therefore, against me. Life is too short for that.

Once you figure out what’s holding you back, what if… you take a step toward your goal, toward something you’ve always wanted to do? I’m not suggesting you jump all in. Rather, simply take one small step. Because one thing I’ve learned is that with the right support, one step leads to another, and another, and pretty soon, your life has changed in significant ways. One step at a time. If you took a step toward your goal, toward what you want in life, what would that step look like?

Life is short, and it passes in the blink of an eye. No matter where you are in your life—young adult, mid-life, or later life—you can make a change. You can take a step. And step by step, you can transform your life and live closer to your dreams. Anything is possible if you just take the first step.

Blame

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The other day, as we were getting ready to sit down to dinner, my son found “blame” on the floor. Apparently, someone (or something) had found it necessary to place blame on the floor after our recent game of Ransom Notes. Now, if you haven’t played Ransom Notes, it is a fun and creative game in which you use word magnets to respond to the prompt cards. Typically, the sentences are not full sentences, and grammar isn’t a thing. The best response of each round wins.

Luckily, I hadn’t vacuumed since we played, or blame would have been misplaced. Permanently. And no one would have been the wiser.

But back to blame…. In truth, placing blame on the floor seems a bit unfair. To the floor, at least. How can a floor be to blame? It couldn’t have acted alone. But come to think of it, the floor might have been in cahoots with gravity in which case I might have to adjust my thinking. Perhaps the floor should shoulder some blame after all.

Then again, gravity might have had a hand in placing blame on the floor to begin with. In that case, gravity is likely the more guilty party. The mystery remains, however, what exactly is the act for which blame is being placed? All of these questions simply because we found “blame” on the floor.

2024

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As I walk into 2024, I feel like my hair is on fire and I have no plan for how to extinguish the flame. There is no fire extinguisher or water readily available, and the fire has gotten out of control. Clearly, the remnants of 2023 are following me into the new year, which—I suppose—is to be expected, though it’s not exactly welcome news. I was hoping to put the past year far behind me and move cleanly into 2024.

The fire started as a slow burn at some point early in the year. I can’t pinpoint the exact moment in time, but I know it was early. Sparks flickering in the darkness ignited a tiny flame. And the “best-way-to-cook-a-frog” thing became my life. The tiny little flame was warm at first, and I could hold my hands out to warm them. My toes too. But then slowly, the heat started to rise and all hell broke loose.

Now I’m going to say, I typically use writing to help me figure out my life and maintain balance. But in 2023, I wasn’t able to write much. Attempts at writing were derailed by a brain that couldn’t shut out the noise of the world long enough to slip into the silence necessary for creative thought to flow. Reports for work, a focus on health, and an unexpected need to transition to a new position all held the foreground as wars, political bickering, and the world’s intense focus on destruction rather than civil discourse, conversation, and compromise held a constant roar in the background. It was a tough year for creatives and anyone who leans toward sensitivity. And anyone concerned about humanity. I am leaving the year feeling battered and bruised and somewhat worse for wear. I’m concerned about the future and happy to team up with anyone who’s feeling the same. Maybe we can create a support network—to talk, to coach each other, and to cry together if that’s what it takes.

This year, at least initially, my focus will be on calm—calm energy, calm activities, calm people. It will be a good change—call it the calm after the storm. I need to tap into the calm that allows for creativity and writing and thinking and growth. I need to focus on both inner and outer peace. I have a plan in place to start me out in the right direction, though we all know how plans go. Sometimes smoothly, most often awry. But it’s a start.

And so, I’ll work on finally putting out last year’s fire so I can move forward. I’ll build the structure necessary to keep writing and to stay on track. Hopefully this year, I won’t be derailed.